CHICKEN SOUP FOR THE BEER DRINKER

[razor d]

CHICKEN SOUP FOR THE BEER DRINKER


> I added an original.
> > >
> > >> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> "When I find myself in a difficult situation I ask myself,
> What Would Jack Daniels Do"?
> >>> Blake Stewart
> >>>>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >"Sometimes when I reflect back on all the beer I drink I feel
shamed.
> > >Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the
> > >brewery and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this
> > >beer, they might be out of work and their dreams would be
> > >shattered. Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink this
> > >beer and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about
> > >my liver." ~ Jack Handy
> > >
> > >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > >
> > >"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the
> > >morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day. " ~Frank
> > >Sinatra
> > >
> > >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > >
> > >"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading." ~
> > >Henny Youngman
> > >
> > >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > >
> > >"24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? I think not."
> > >~ Stephen Wright
> > >
> > >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > >
> > >"When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep.
> > >When
> > we
> > >fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to
> > >heaven. Sooooo, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!" ~ Brian
> > >O'Rourke
> > >
> > >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > >
> > >"Beer is proof that God loves us & wants us to be happy." ~
> > >Benjamin Franklin
> > >
> > >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > >
> > >"Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind
> > >is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention,
> > >but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza." ~ Dave Barry!
> > >
> > >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > >
> > >Remember "I" before "E", except in Budweiser.
> > >
> > >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > >
> > >To some it's a six-pack, to me it's a Support Group. Salvation in a
> > can!
> > >
> > >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > >
> > >And saving the best for last, as explain ed by Cliff Clavin, of
> > >Cheers. One afternoon at Cheers, Cliff Clavin was explaining the
> > >Buffalo Theory to his buddy Norm. Here's how it went:
> > >
> > >"Well, ya see, Norm, it's like this ... A herd of buffalo can only
> > >move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted,
> > >it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed
> > >first. This
> > natural
> > >selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general
> > >speed
> > and
> > >health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of
> > >the weakest members. In much the same way, the human brain can only
> > >operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of
> > >alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks
> > >the slowest and weakest brain cells first In this way, regular
> > >consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the
> > >brain a faster and more efficient machine. That's why you always
> > >feel smarter after a few beers."
> > >

[JACKEDUPFREAK]

good stuff

[TURTLE]

Mmmmm, beeeeeeeer :P

[g2000g]

hahahaha i thought ol frank sinatras was the best myself